You know that the realities of life hit you when instead of buying the next big SUPER ULTRA GAMING WAAAAH 99.000 keyboard, you just buy a clonker that is easy to clean.
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90% of all people that ever lived have suffered from diarrhea at least once in their lives... does that mean the remaining 10% enjoyed it?!?
Got a lovely call from Microsoft's tech support today. They said that there's a virus on my pc. They said they can fix it.
I installed team viewer and let them connect. THE INDIAN SCAMMER NINCOMPOOP WAS STARING AT MY SCREEN, CLICKING AROUND RANDOM THINGS, TOTALLY CONFUSED.
I asked "I know it looks bad, even my start menu is gone (I use gnome), can you fix it?
The call ended with an Indian insult as he hung up.
I met a girl the other day. She must be a keyboard, because she's my type!
Failure is not an option—it comes bundled with the software.
The only dates I get these days are software updates.
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
To anyone who's curious, my new years resolution is 1440p!
I don't know what the difference between ignorance and apathy is, and I don't care!
Writing a horror screenplay. It starts off with a ringing phone. The person answers, and it's their mum saying "I have a computer question."
If someone from the 1950s suddenly appeared, what would be the most difficult thing to explain about life today?
One answer: “I possess a device in my pocket that is capable of accessing the entirety of information known to man. I use it to look at pictures of cats and get into arguments with strangers.”
Can't see an end. I have no control and I don't think there's an escape. I don't even have a home anymore. Think it's time for a new keyboard.
I would like to thank everybody that stuck by my side for those five long minutes my house didn't have internet.
I paid attention enough in history classes to know modern society didn't event emojis. They were just under a different name: HIEROGLYPHICS
When life gives you melons, make melonade!
Turns out that being an uncle in relation to being a father is not so bad - you get roughly 60% of the benefits and 0% of the downsides!
I used to think I was indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.
On my old job, nobody liked our previous foreman because he was too bossy; so one day we took him with us to a bar. It wasn't long before he started ordering everyone a round!
I would like to thank a user, whom has asked to remain anonymous, for explaining the word "many" to me. It means a lot! -
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