Good evening, everyone. While this is my first post on this site, I am not a newbie to Linux Distros. Ubuntu has been my OS of choice since 7.04, after running Fedora, OpenSuse and Xandros before deciding on my current choice. My question is going to be a little complex, and for that I apologize in advance. I live in a moderate crime area, and fears of my laptops and desktops being stolen eats at me a bit. My gf runs Windows 7 x64 on her laptop, and with it, I can create an anonymous admin account that allows users to connect to their wireless networks. I can also install rootkits and keyloggers that will allow me to not only track the laptop's location, but also remote in to see their activities, and have a log of every website they go to, as well as their email addresses, and social network accounts, and passwords. I could have a lot of fun at their expense. However, it was brought to my attention that Linux may be too secure for it's own good in this respect. How could I go about creating a similar open experience on Ubuntu, while having the ability to install keyloggers, and the like to be able to track them? My fear is that they will simply wipe the laptop as soon as they get it. I know that I can turn on BIOS passwords, etc., to make it impossible to overwrite the HDD, or boot from any media other than the hard drive, but how can I ensure that if this laptop is ever stolen, I can recover it? Mind you, it's not an expensive machine, but, there is no price for peace of mind. Not to mention being able to play with someone using TeamViewer would be fun.