Torvalds: It's Time to Dump the Penguin

by Harry Zass, special correspondent to Linux Online

April 1, 2005

Linus Torvalds had the crowd at the VFW hall in Keokuk, Iowa mesmerized as he spoke on a wide variety of subjects - from 64 bit support in the kernel to what it was like being married to the former karate champion of Finland. The KILUG members let out a collective gasp, however, when Torvalds, asked to sign 5-year-old Seth Cronchman's stuffed penguin, held it up and asked the crowd: 'Don't you think its time to get rid of this stupid little bird?'.

As soon as Torvalds had arrived back at his Oregon home, he fired off an email to the Linux kernel mailing list.

Fellow Kernel contributors,

I'm _totally_ sick of wearing penguin shirts, dressing up in penguin
costumes, signing people's penguin posters and looking at those
stuffed penguins that kids carry around (which are nothing but a good
transmitter of diseases!). I propose now that the penguin be
_scrapped_ in favor of something much more representative of Linux. I
mean, the penguin was great when Linux was the cute, up-and-coming,
sort of _little engine that could_ operating system. But now, with
Linux being the most _excellent_, fabulous and utterly cool operating
system ever (yeh, that's right Steve Jobs - you _know_ it is pal!), I
just don't think the fat little flightless bird is doing the trick for
us. As you know from working with me, I am totally open to suggestions
(as long as it isn't about memory management), so I'm setting a
deadline of midnight, April 1st, to come up with a better
mascot. Please send your submissions in PNG format _ONLY_ (no GIFs!) I
have attached a logo that I particularly like of a _proud_ poodle-like
dog. It sort of symbolizes the pride I feel about Linux and how
everybody thought it was a _dog_ (up until the VA Linux IPO of
course). Though others might still think it's a dog (yeh, that's you
BillyG!), it's a damn proud dog. So send your images along. There
might be some other animal out there that I haven't even thought of
that better represents Linux  Remember, before midnight, April 1. 
NO LATE SUBMISSIONS ACCEPTED!

Linus 

Though Torvalds won't make the submissions public until a new mascot is chosen on April 4th, a sampling of some of the kernel contributors shows the community leaning toward the dog. Said one kernel hacker who asked not to be named: "Hey, Linus wants the dog. You know how it works around here. Linux gets what he wants. If he wants some strutting poodle, then it's fine with us, I guess."

Laura DiDio, analyst for the Yankee Group pointed out the negative aspects of changing the Linux mascot: "Everybody has always associated Linux with the penguin and there is a huge merchandising industry based on it. All these small-time vendors with their warehouses full of t-shirts, hats and stuffed penguins. What are they going to do now? Other than selling them to Antarctic tour operators, there's no market for them. These people are going to have to accept millions in losses. I think we have the potential for a class-action suit against Torvalds that will make the SCO case look like a summons for an unpaid speeding ticket."

Meanwhile, Torvalds remains firm. He thinks it's time to dump the penguin. We'll have to wait until April 4th to see if Linus' dog becomes the new Linux mascot.

UPDATE: April 2, 2005 We hope you enjoyed our little April Fools joke for 2005!